saying goodbye

today is one of the hardest days of my life. with so many changes happening around me with regard to finances, jobs, friends, and many other things, their is only one thing on my mind and that is the incredible happiness that I feel for my daughter. she is embarking on the most incredible adventure, "music technology" at montana state university, "a bobcat cheerleader", her first job, and taking care of herself for the first time. today we packed up all of her dresses. for those of you who know her, know that she is a princess and shoes and jewerly and bling are very important to her. she is, on the outside, so beautiful and full of life. she is, on the inside, so innocent and kind, non-judgemental, forgiving, strong, faithful, talented and someone that any girl would be lucky to call "best friend" and any boy ecstatic to call "girl friend." the day she was born was one of the happiest days of my life and since then she has been my main source of companionship, joy, and all around time sink. i can't imagine what i will do with myself now that she is gone and who will ask me everyday, "does this look good," or "mom, what do you think about this"? thank heavens for skype and my beautiful son talen.

today, i took them to subway for one last summer lunch, ran errands to get all the last minute things that she will need in montana, and one last summer photo shoot with her brother.

as sad as i am right now, and let me say this pain i feel is soooo soooo bad, i am truly happy for her and all of mine and her hard work to get her to this very point was so worth it.

in my heart i know that this will be the beginning of the rest of her life and i know i will always be her mommy and best friend. i love her so much that words alone wouldn't be enough to describe it.

all you other mom's sending your hearts off to college my heart goes out to you.

xoxo